I remember once. It was seven years ago. My mother thought I was playing the Nintendo 64 too much. She didn't like that. Super Mario 64 was always my favourite game. I played 60 minutes a day. She liked me playing 59 minutes and 59.59 seconds per day. Hyper-realism was in play when she hyper-realistically unplugged my hyper-realistic N64 and threw it down from a window on the second floor of the home. My mom was a hyper-realist. Next my television with “that box” behind it was second to fall on the grass after crushing the really real Nintendo under its hyper-realistic weight. It was 1996. I now consider my mother a hyper-idealist. She walked down the stairs and opened the front door in order to get to the electronic debris and threw a hyper-realistically hyper-realistic lighter from the world of hyper-idealism down to that of hyper-realism on the “slightly used” junk and realistically blew up the home. She died instantly.

I followed her outside and it turned out that I was scared of her because I ran to our hyper-realistic neighbours. I wasn't in the blast radius. I didn't die. I'm still alive. My conclusion is that this is hyper-realistic.

In a hyper-realistic world dominated by the ideal of realism being labelled hyper-realism due to the fact that hyper-idealism is a hyper-realist’s hyper-ideal hyper-idealist’s ideology because I think it’s hyper-realistically realistic. Hyper-ideologically hyper-ideological in my ideological hyper-ideology I must say.

Anyway today I looked for a Nintendo 64 on eBay. Idealistic is what I told myself. Because refers to the list that is Craig’s which in turn means that it’s Craig’s list. Now you get it. Hyper-spooky! I quickly found one. It was black. Like most N64’s. I bought it for free. “Buying” it for free is hyper-real. It came with a Mario cartridge. It read Super Mom 64. Or so I thought. I'm a real dyslexic. It read Hyper-Realistic Mom 64.

I went back home and played it. The title screen was there and it played REALLY normally. I got Peach’s invitation telling me to rear her in her behind here—and have cake with the Todd’s. Everything was really real when the real Lakitu hyper-realistically glided on the floatation device that was a cloud. But when Mario jumped out of the green pipe something felt different. She really was my mom. I quickly ran to the front door into Peach’s Castle. That was unfortunate. Lakitu was nowhere in sight anymore. I felt depressed. Mostly because I love when a camera’s pointed towards me and I’m in the spotlight. In the game I am always feeling like a rich celebrity and all hyper-realistic eyes are real and are really aimed up at me. But then I looked at the doors’ knobs. It was splattered with the faint splatter of HYPER-REALISTIC BLOOD!!11!! THIS SIGHT WAS SHOCKING FOR THE MOST PART. WHAT I SAW NEXT PALED IN COMPARISON. IT WAS THE FIRST TOAD TELLING ME IT WAS STUCK IN THE WALL.

Mario-Mom and I then went through the first painting. Everything was a hyper-realist’s realism. I went to the top of Bob-Omb Mountain to combat King Bob-Omb. Never mind. What I saw instead was a Nintendo 64. King Bob-Omb fell on top of it. The world within the portrait exploded. It was raining. HYPER-REALISTIC BLOOD OMG—this is ideological. When the blood shower ceased, I could make out the words on the cartridge (that I didn’t mention) in the N64 which KBO detonated. It read something.

You played for 59 minutes and 59.60 seconds or 60 minutes when I told you not to.

–Signed (comma) Mario-Mom. Hear my hyper-realistic realism in this ideologically ideological ideal from within the really real realization of hyper-realistically hyper-real hyper-realization realized by hyper-really (comma) an ideal hyper-idealist’s hyper-ideology’s hyper-realism’s realizations that realness is ideological and also creates your hyper-ideologically realistically realisms developed by that realism’s hyper-ideological Hyper-Realism.

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